1 Week old! I missed seeing you today little man

Enjoyed church today

Helaman 5:12

Remember, remember that it is upon the rock of our Redeemer, who is Christ, the Son of God, that ye must build your foundation; that when the devil shall send forth his might winds, yea, his shafts in the whirlwind, yea, when all his hail and his mighty storm shall beat upon you, it shall have no power over you to drag you down to the gulf of misery and endless wo, because of the rock upon which ye are built, which is a sure foundation, a foundation whereon if men build they CANNOT fall.

I miss him. The nurse called and he opened his eyes and cried for the first time.

I found another great inspirational blog http://patrickandashley.blogspot.com/ a sad story but a very inspirational woman who is overcoming adversity.

Day 7 A little setback

People told us get ready for the highs and lows. I thought they meant with Austin not me. Saturday I had a few errands to run and I stopped by to see him in the morning. Later that afternoon Azlyn was running a fever. I took her into the instacare and she has strep throat. She got on antibiotics. The nicu says that we need to stay home for 48 hours before we can go visit him again. I miss him to pieces.

The pros: I get to spend time with azlyn, go to church, watch the pro bowl. We rented a movie last night and it was really the first time I got to relax. Azzie is feeling great now that she has been on medicine for a day.

Austin update

He is doing great! I call every few hours to check on him. Today is his last day on antiobiotics, he is tolerating his tube fed breastmilk, his jaundice is normal and should be off the lights, he is almost on room air. Our next hurdle is learning how to eat which we will start doing monday either bottle or breast. I'm playing it by ear. I just want him to come home. I hope he starts to wake up and be more active and has the desire to eat. Crossing my fingers and praying that all goes well the next few days.

Day 6- We got to hold him

One proud papa! We finally got to hold him!

Austin update

He is barely on any oxygen, he is on whats called a high flow nasal canula but only on a level 2. I wouldn't be surprised if he goes to room air. His lungs are doing better and aren't really the hard part right now. He is just sick and they don't know why. My personal opinion was that when I was pregnant either the ICP or some infection in utero happened because he didn't move or kick much the last few days before he was born and I didn't feel good. My body said it was time to get him out and I'm not one to have pre-term labor. He is sleepy, when he gets poked and prodded by the nurses most babies cry, he doesn't seem to mind. He moves and wimpers, so they are looking for him to be more active. He is so sleepy he cant breastfeed, he has to be tube fed. Hopefully the next few days he will get better and well rested for the big task at hand-Breastfeeding. He also is a little jaundice and has to be under the lights. Also needs to hold his body temperature and then we can go home!

We also took advantage of the perks of the nicu. My dearest mom took me to maurices to get me some new clothes! I was so excited to try on cute jeans after 5 months of maternity clothes. Then we got to go out on the town to Rodizios for dinner! Not too many people get to go shopping and on a date 5 days after having a baby. Of course I would trade it all to be home.

Day 5- A fresh breathe of air

I learned how to breathe! The nurse called at 9am and said he was off the ventilator! I was shocked because last I had heard they were going to think about it today. But our little trooper did so well overnight the had too! I drove as fast as I could and was amazed. The best way to explain it was the last few days I was just praying he would be ok. Today I met and fell in love with my son. I see his personality, he moves, he breathes, he makes baby noises. He is normal. It's as if I went to heaven and was handed my son.

He still has a few little issues. His IV tube is down his umbilical cord which they are getting rid of today. He has a feeding tube and is responding well to breastmilk. Soon today or tomorrow we will be able to hold and feed him. Me and Trevor had a great date night. We went down and took infant CPR class, had dinner at the hospital cafeteria and tucked Austin in for the night. I have the best husband in the world, I love you babe! Also thanks for all of the hundreds of people bringing dinners, babysitting Azzie, and running my two older kids around. This is one busy schedule!

Day 4 Got Milk!

Today was an ok day, not much changes but we both got milk! He got a teaspoon full through a feeding tube. Mama also got milk, ouch! I went to NICU scrapbooking night and met alot of other parents with kids currently in the nicu. Some have cleft palats, some are just needing a little extra help with breathing. It was very nice to have someone to relate too.

My dad got to hold me! Trevor stayed late and they needed to change the sheet underneath me so Trevor got to hold him while they changed the bedding! He was so excited, as for me ya I was jealous. His ventilator numbers went down and we are hoping tomorrow is even better. Good night little man!

Day 3 Jan 25th Family Picture Day!

Today he got off his blood pressure medicine! First major accomplishment. Mom and Dad are getting the NICU routine down. Every day it gets a little easier. Sometimes it feels like going to medical school when you visit. You try to find out when he gets to come home but they can never give you a date. They say he should be in there for a while and realistically he should be home between Feb 9-21st. If he comes home any earlier its a miracle and blessing.

I got my first picture with my mom & dad today. Although the other kids are not able to visit, they are there in spirit and there are pictures of them at his bedside. I am still listed as critical but they were able to get my hand & footprints done today for a scrapbook. Carli got a big sister shirt!

Everyone asks how I am doing. I will have to say great under the circumstances. It is the hardest thing I have ever had to go through. But there are friends and family members that I know of that have harder things to deal with right now and they inspire me every day. The pros are I get a lot of sleep! I get to spend a lot of time with my 3 other kids. Its hard to walk in and out of the hospital and see healthy babies go home, but they look so tired. When I get out of there it will be one of the best days of my life. I have felt so much love and support from my husband, children, friends and family, but most of all my savior Jesus Christ has held my hand every step of the way. I also have a song by David Osmond called the Lonliest Walk off his new CD. 

 Here are the lyrics. and its a miracle and a crazy story on how I found this song.

you can hear it at davidosmond.com, click on music

She pushes L on that old elevator door

Her heart is broken, arms are bare

The doors are closing and she's staring at the floor

There's still a piece of her up there

It seems like yesterday she saw him on the screen

Painted a room and picked out names

But now she has to leave him under big machines

To keep alive his tiny frame

She's on the way to her car, but its never felt this far

With each step she takes there's another to follow

And one more ache, one more tear to swallow

She's gotta keep moving

Forget about the bruising inside

Through the loneliest walk of her life

He pushes up the board they've tied onto his shoulders

He bears, with dignity, disgrace

He hears the jeering and the wind is getting colder

Tastes the blood upon his face

His body bruised and back still open from the scourges

The consequence of wicked men

He knows no man on earth has ever deserved this

But still he bears it all for them

And He keeps moving up the hill to do his fathers will

Withe each step he takes theres another to follow

and one more ache, one more tear to swallow

we all stand by and watch as the price is paid

Through the loneliest walks of his life

so we don't feel alone in the night

we can have his hand holding the light

through the lowliest walks of our lives

Keep pushing through this lonely walk youre going through

Cause someones walked this way before

NICU Day 2 Jan 24th

We called today Grandma Day! Both his grandmas got to see him and also Aunt Kali. They too have been up for days and helping me and my family as much as possible. Today Austin started to show a few signs of breathing on his own for a few hours. I pooped and Aunt Kali got to change my diaper!

There are not enough Thank You's in the world that go out to my friends and family. Thanks for putting up with my emotions and just for all of your support. I have literally hundreds of emails, facebook comments, phone calls, and text messages every day.

My Labor Story

From about week 32 of pregnancy I started feeling tired, miserable, couldn't sleep, and my skin would itch. I asked my obgyn that I was itchy and he told me to try lotion, benadryl to help with the itch. One night me and Trevor went on a date out to dinner. Later that night I had uncontrollable itching everywhere to the point I was in tears. I went online and found a website called itchymoms.com which there is a disease called Intrahepatic Cholestasis of Pregnancy that causes itchy skin in pregnancy. ICP also carries an increased risk of premature labor, fetal and maternal hemorrhaging, fetal distress, and stillbirth. I was scarred. So later the next day I called my OBGYN and got in to take the blood test to see if I had ICP. Turns out I did. It is a disease where toxins go into your bloodstream and cause the skin to itch due to your pregnancy hormones and liver/gall bladder not processing correctly. The next day I was scheduled for a non stress test. Baby looked good, but he wasn't very active and I started having contractions I thought were braxton hicks. I was dilated to a 2 so my dr sent me home and said stay off your feet. Later that night about 11:30 I started having painful contractions and me and Trevor went to Labor and Delivery. They gave me a shot which stopped my contractions and I was sent home at 5AM. The rest of that day I tried to get some sleep. I had a lot of pressure down there and some more intermittent contractions. About 5 PM Saturday night the every few minute contractions started again. We went back to labor and delivery and I was dialated to a 4 so I was admitted.

 I was 35 weeks and 6 days pregnant

.

I was a little scared but what can you do? After 5 IV pokes, 1 great epidural, no sleep for 2 days, 13 hours later Austin Thomas Jensen was born Sunday Jan 23rd @ 5:52 AM. 

They took him to the warmer and a few minutes later he was not breathing and started CPR. Then they sent out a call on the radio "Code Blue"(code blue means not responding to resuscitation). Immediately we had an insane amount of people in the room. They put him on cpap and were desperately waiting for the newborn lifeflight team.  Lifeflight finally arrived and were able to stabilize him but he had to be put on the HFOV (high frequency oscillation ventilation) to help him breathe.

The new riverton hospital also does not have a NICU only a high level nursery so they lifeflighted him to IMC NICU about 2 hours after he was born. I did get to kiss him and say "I will see you later bud, mom loves you"

They cut off his baby band off my arm and took me to a mom/baby postpartum room. Trevor walked his new son out to the helicopter and sent him off. The helicopter rattles the entire hospital and I was able to see it take off from my room. I prayed he would make it there safely.

After a major breakdown moment with Trevor which I never ever want to recall again being emotionally drained from the whole experience and hadn't slept in 3 days. I somehow managed to eat breakfast and take quick nap. The good thing was the AFC/NFC championship game was on starting at 1PM Chicago's Jay Cuter vs Aaron Rogers GB Packers. (Something to distract me) Go Bears. (too bad they lost eventually) So I turn on the TV. Its broke! You take away a womans baby and NFL Game? OH HECK NO! I found the nurse button ASAP and said you either get me a TV, move rooms, or I am leaving! I started to pack. They did eventually fix the TV and we watched half of the game but my Dr discharged me around 2PM. I went home, eat, relaxed, watched the Steelers vs Jets AFC Game (crappy Pitt won) and me and Trevor went down to the IMC Nicu to visit Austin.

He was doing better and it was actually such a sweet experience. We had an awesome nurse named Wendy. No tears and somehow I felt that he would be OK. I fell in love even with all of the tubes and wires. I finally found out he weighed 5 lbs 11 ounces and was 19 3/4 inch long. A head full of hair, and all 10 fingers and toes. His major problems are: Not able to breath without major HFOV assistance, low blood pressure, and is sick (sepsis) which antibiotics are fixing but requires a 7 day treatment. The Neonatologist said it was not ICP that caused him to be so sick. They still don't know and will never know the cause of why he is so sick. I mean yes he is early but should not be in this bad of shape but we can only go up from here. Right?

Getting Ready

Finally came up with a name. Austin Thomas Jensen due 2/21/11

34 weeks-enjoying sleepless nights, itchy skin, and using the bathroom every 30 minutes.

Now that the holidays are over, we painted the room from pink to brown, set up the crib, and have been shopping for a lot of blue.

I hope everything goes well and we end up with a happy, healthy baby with all ten fingers and toes. We are so excited for his arrival.